A Reminder: Not Every Woman Can Carry A Child
There’s still a lot of educating to be done about comments on women unable to carry their children and rely on other options physically
Women have often been told that being a mother is one of the greatest gifts. But unknown to many, not every woman is fortunate enough to carry their child because of health issues.
Actress Selena Gomez spoke about this matter in her interview with Vanity Fair. The Only Murder in The Buildings told the magazine that due to health condition, she will not be able to to carry her own child in the future.
“I unfortunately can’t carry my own children. I have a lot of medical issues that would put my life and the baby’s in jeopardy. That was something I had to grieve for a while,” she said.
Selena, who has opened about her lupus condition, shared that even though it’s not what she envisioned, she takes it in stride.
“I thought it would happen the way it happens for everyone. [But] I’m in a much better place with that. I find it a blessing that there are wonderful people willing to do surrogacy or adoption, which are both huge possibilities for me. It made me really thankful for the other outlets for people who are dying to be moms. I’m one of those people. I’m excited for what that journey will look like, but it’ll look a little different. At the end of the day, I don’t care. It’ll be mine. It’ll be my baby.”
Her vulnerability got mixed reactions, making her speak up at a dinner, wherein she brought up the matter. She pointed out that there’s nothing wrong with being vulnerable.
“I really want to be an advocate for women, and that’s why I share; that’s why I like to be honest because everybody’s going through something,” she said. “I don’t have it all put together. I am me, and that’s all I can be.”
Even with stars like Selena pointing out that health issues can be a reason, some people still frown or take pity that there are women who can’t carry their children no matter how they explain. There shouldn’t be pity, just understanding.
What if you were in a health crisis?
As humans, we always want to talk about other people’s business. Having kids is just an example. Women were always told that being a mother is one of the best things. The excitement of pregnancy, the first time to hear the heartbeat, and carrying the child for nine months. But what if not everyone can do that?
For years, we’ve often heard about women wanting to be mothers but cannot be for many reasons. In Selena’s case, her health condition was a factor to consider. She was diagnosed with lupus, and the last thing she wants is for her health and her baby’s health to be jeopardized.
We don’t know how she will be a mom one day. She can either have it through surrogacy or adoption. It’s her choice. But it seems some people want to share their thoughts about women getting pregnant. A reminder to people out there: not everyone can carry their child. There are women out there who can’t because of their health or for reasons we are not privy too.
In times when women’s issues are once again in the spotlight, people need to be reminded that women have the right to make their own decisions when it comes to having kids. If their health is on the line, it’s something to consider. It’s never about not wanting to carry the child. It’s because as much as they want, their bodies might be unable to do so.
Let’s be considerate
The moment you find out that a female friend of yours gets married, sometimes you automatically ask: “So when will you have kids?” Although you mean well, it’s time to stop asking this question. Not every couple who gets married may want to have kids for all we know.
In Selena’s case, she was open about the fact that she would never be able to carry her child because of her health condition. But it doesn’t make her less of a woman. She wants to let women out there know there is nothing wrong about being honest.
Before we even say something about women getting pregnant, maybe we should consider the factors women go through. Health conditions like lupus, cancer, and even fertility are reasons why women may be unable to carry their child and go through surrogacy.
So, before we make comments about pregnancy to other women, let’s ponder and think about it. It can be a challenge for women to have children. Every woman has a different case.
Let’s be considerate of what we say because as much as you want to help and give advice, it may be the other way around. After all, none of us want to be told what to do with our bodies as they know it.
More on women’s health
A New Study on Endometriosis Shines Hope for Infertility
7 Things Moms Should Know About Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS)
