Why The Roses Hits Home for Married Couples Everywhere

A couple finds themselves in a tense confrontation after egos get in the way of their marriage

What happens when love turns to resentment and betrayal?

In The Roses, Benedict Cumberbatch and Olivia Colman star as Theo and Ivy Rose — the epitome of a loving couple who move to America to follow their dreams.

But when Theo gets fired and Ivy takes on the responsibility of supporting the family, egos are bruised and roles are reversed. Their toxic friends only make things worse — encouraging them to work things out, but often adding fuel to the fire.

The Roses is a modern take on the 1989 film The War of the Roses, starring Kathleen Turner and Michael Douglas, based on the novel by Warren Adler.

Photo from Searchlight Pictures

Curious why married couples should watch the movie? Here’s why.

Spoilers ahead

When Pride Gets in the Way of the Relationship

Theo is an ambitious architect, while Ivy, who previously worked in a hotel restaurant, dreams of opening her own. When Theo is fired from his architecture firm, Ivy steps in to support the family by running the diner they opened together.

The diner soon gains popularity after a glowing review from a food critic. As Ivy becomes busy opening more branches, Theo’s insecurity grows. It doesn’t help that he becomes the subject of viral internet memes after one of his designs collapses during a storm.

Photo from Searchlight Pictures

At one point, Ivy suggests that Theo focus on building their dream house while she funds it. But it’s in that very house where their relationship begins to fall apart.

When pride gets in the way, communication breaks down, and with it, the connection that holds a marriage together.

Role Reversals

Traditionally, society sees fathers as providers and mothers as caregivers. The Roses flips that dynamic. Theo becomes the primary caregiver for their two children, while Ivy becomes the family’s main breadwinner.

Though unsure of himself at first, Theo eventually forms a strong bond with their kids. Unlike Ivy, who spoils them with sweets, Theo sets rules around sugar and encourages physical activity. That disciplineDisciplineTeaching a child self-control and acceptable behavior through guidance rather than fear. Effective discipline is consistent and calm, explains the reason for a rule, and uses consequences that fit the sticks, and eventually, the kids attend a fitness camp in Florida.

Photo from Searchlight Pictures

As Theo grows closer to the children, Ivy starts feeling left out. She realizes she’s missing important milestonesMilestonesSkills most children reach by certain ages, such as smiling, sitting, walking, speaking, and sharing. They serve as general guides rather than strict deadlines, and parents should talk to a — like their daughter’s experience with pubertyPubertyThe phase when a child's body matures, usually between ages 8 and 14, bringing growth spurts, body changes, and strong emotions. Calm, accurate conversations before changes start help children feel — and wishes she had been there.

Role reversal isn’t new. In today’s economy, it’s common for wives to earn more than their husbands. In these cases, many fathers take on domestic roles — hence, the term “houseband.” Just look at countless OFW families, where mothers go abroad to work and leave caregiving duties to their spouses or relatives. Men doing housework? It’s not just okay — it’s necessary, and increasingly normal.

When Supportive Friends Aren’t So Supportive

Theo and Ivy are surrounded by friends they met after moving from London to California. There’s Barry, a divorce lawyer, and his wife Amy. There’s Rory and Sally, another couple close to the Roses. And rounding out the group are Jeffrey and Jane, Ivy’s sous chefs and coworkers at the diner.

While these friends appear supportive, some cause more harm than good. Amy is attracted to Theo and repeatedly tries to cross boundaries. Meanwhile, group discussions about Theo and Ivy’s relationship often spark more conflict than resolution.

Photo from Searchlight Pictures

It’s important to have friends you can lean on in hard times. But those friends should be trustworthy, supportive, and respectful. Gossip and drama may seem harmless, but when your marriage is on shaky ground, the wrong kind of “support” can widen the cracks.

Photo from Searchlight Pictures

The Roses: A Gentle Reminder for Married Couples

The Roses is full of witty British humor and biting sarcasm that many will enjoy. But beyond the comedy, it’s a powerful reminder: marriage is not a one-time promise — it’s ongoing work.

It’s not just about the honeymoon phase or a lavish wedding. It’s about growing together, shifting roles with grace, and choosing to lift each other rather than tear each other down.

Marriage isn’t just about promises made at the altar or living happily ever after. It’s about choosing each other — even when roles shift, pride stings, or life gets messy. And if things do fall apart, there’s still a way to part with respect, not regret.

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