Moms and Dads

Lessons We Picked Up From Comedian Pokwang’s Relationship

During an interview with Karen Davila, comedian Pokwang shared how she’s slowly picking up her life after her failed relationship with Lee O’Brien — including being strong for her kids.

Pokwang, fondly called Mamang by her close friends in showbiz, is known as a comedian. But when it comes to being a mother, she’ll do everything for her two children. In recent months, the news of her failed relationship with her former partner, American actor Lee O’Brien, made headlines on social media, with Pokwang posting details of what transpired.

In an interview with Karen Davila on her YouTube channel, Pokwang shared lessons from the failed relationship and what women can learn from it if faced with the situation.

Pokwang
Photo Source: Marietta Subong Instagram

For Pokwang, it was work that became her fuel to move on

Pokwang admitted that she hoped she and Lee could try to fix things for the sake of their daughter. But when it wasn’t working out, she turned to the work that was given to her to initiate the healing process.

“Sa dami ng trabaho ko ngayon, sobrang thankful ako, sobrang nagpapasalamat ako sa lahat ng mga tao na binabato ako ng trabaho ngayon.”

Currently, Pokwang is doing a cooking show and a morning variety show on GMA. She also has four movies in the pipeline.

Get the lessons from the pain

When people love, chances are they will do everything. And that’s precisely what Pokwang did. Having gone through several relationships herself (she has a daughter from a previous relationship and another child who died), Pokwang said that the risk has its lessons.

“Ganun talaga, nagmahal ka. Walang taong matalino pagdating sa pagmamahal. Nagiging bobo tayo sa lahat. And kung ano man iyon, naging masaya ka naman. Kunin mo yung lesson. Hindi para manisi ka pa.”

As of now, Pokwang wants to remain focused on working for the future of her two children.

Sometimes, people need to learn empathy

When Karen asked how she handles the criticism after she spoke about the breakup, Pokwang admitted she was extremely disappointed with the move-on comments.

“Wala kayo kasi sa situation ko. Madaling sabihin na mag-move on ka na, na bitter ka kasi hindi kayo ang nakakaranas ng pain,” Pokwang said.

“At ipagdasal niyo na sana hindi mangyari sa inyo, sa mga kamag-anak niyo, sa best friend niyo. Sana huwag nila pagdaanan yung pinagdadaanan ko. Kasi walang sugat na malalim na matakpan ng band aid ay okay na.”

What was worse, according to Pokwang, was that many of those comments came from women.

“Kapwa ko mga babae ang mga nang-gaganyan sa akin. Mga nanay. Nanay kayo. Babae kayo. Hindi niyo ako nagegets? Mas tanggap ko pa kung lalaki ang nambabash sa akin.”

She added that instead of people making comments and telling her to keep quiet, Pokwang told critics to make sure that her situation is something they will never go through especially female family members.

Pokwang
Photo Source: Marietta Subong Instagram

Do everything you can for your child

At one point in the interview, Pokwang became emotional when she shared how her daughter Malia prayed for her and her dad. That’s when she realized it was time to let go of the cause of the pain and start again.

“Meron siyang isang dasal na thank you kay mama. Si dada, bahala na kayo po sa kanya kung hindi na siya babalik sa amin,” Pokwang recalled of Malia’s prayer.

“Napaka-unselfish nung bata. And then umiyak siya. Nung nakita ko na umiyak yung anak ko, okay that’s it.”

“Kasi tayong mga nanay, pag inuluwal mo yung anak mo, paglabas na labas niya, yung iyak niya ang unang maririnig mo. Iyon ang nagbigay sa iyo ng hope,” she added. “Pag umiyak na siya ngayon, malaki na siya. Iba na iyon. Pain na iyon sa isang ina.”

After that incident, she vowed to give everything she can for Malia. “Lalaban tayo.”

Don’t blame yourself for loving

When Karen asked for one piece of advice she can share, Pokwang said to love despite the possibility of hurting. “Kung nasaktan kayo, ganun talaga. Magheheal din iyan. Huwag na huwag mo sisishin sarili mo.”

“Now na natuto ka, nakita mo na yung pain na naidulot sa iyo, mahalin mo na ang sarili mo.”

Read more about single parents’ stories!

Risa Hontiveros: The Single Parents’ Voice and Champion

Powerful Lessons from Celebrity Single Moms

More Than Meets The Eye: What Its Like To Be A Single Mom

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