Moms and Dads
Ruffa Gutierrez’s Motherly Love: Passing Womanly Strength and Courage to The Next Generation
Ever as real as it gets, Ruffa Gutierrez proudly shares the hard-earned lessons learned from single parenting and the wisdom she bestows on her two teenage daughters
Many can speculate as to how much they know about Ruffa’s story—from her rise as an actress in the 80s to winning a beauty pageant in the 90s to her successful showbiz ventures and even to her publicized separation in 2007 (and eventual annulment in 2012). But behind the glitz, the glamour, and the ever-intrusive noses of naysayers and gossipmongers, there is much more to her than the ordinary tale of the girl on TV. Hers is a story where strength and courage prevail, where passion and hard work pays, and an enduring career in the cutthroat industry of Philippine showbiz becomes a testament to her character. Ruffa Gutierrez has proven to be a successful woman, whose triumphs in life pay homage to a loving family and reflect her determination to succeed and set an example of excellence to the two teenage daughters she raised by herself.
Having lived most of her life under the limelight, Ruffa is well-aware of the privileges she continues to enjoy yet familiar with the downside as well. And with her children (Venice, 16 and Lorin, 17) growing in an era of an unforgiving social media audience and continuous visual pressure, her advice is not without wisdom, “I always tell them to just be used to it. Because back in the day, there were no social media. And now with social media, everything’s scrutinized even more. Sometimes there are instances when children go on Instagram or TikTok. And they’ll say, ‘Oh how come they’re traveling and we’re not?’ You know, there’s a sense of insecurity with the kids nowadays. So I always tell them, ‘Listen, you have to be strong, you always have to be grateful and thankful for everything that you have. And always be careful because we come from a showbiz family. So anything that you post, anything that you say, will be taken against you one day.’ With regards to their bodies, I just would like to teach them to love their bodies the way it is, and to love themselves for who they are, for their God-given talents and attributes when it comes to physical features.”
Raising independent women
Ruffa Gutierrez shares how different the lives of her children are compared to hers. At their current age, she was already in movies and television, working hard to fulfill a dream. But this is also where she draws similarities. “I believe that we’re go-getters. For me, I’m always ambitious, I always want to reach my goal, fulfill my dreams. And I always tell them to be strong, God-fearing individuals—to not just be a follower. You have to create your own destiny. And I want them to see that, ‘Listen, I am a single mom. And I was able to raise you both successfully. You don’t need a dad.’ Because sometimes feeling ko is they have this complex that ‘We don’t have a dad.’ ‘Are you the only ones that don’t have a dad, you’re not the only children that don’t have dads.’ There’s a lot of broken families out there and that shouldn’t be a detriment,” she says.
With Lorin graduating next year, Ruffa shares her excitement as her daughter unfolds a new chapter in her life. She shares, “Lorin is going to be studying in the States—hopefully if the pandemic is over. She also has a backup school in the Philippines.” Venice, on the other hand, is still in high school. But regardless of what they want, all Ruffa wants is for them to grow with the values she herself learned. “I would support my kids, whatever they want to pursue. And I’ll just be here to guide them, to show them the way, to hold their hands and make sure that they already know their values—the Filipino values that they must have. I already told Lorin, ‘Listen, if you want to study abroad, you have to take up self-defense, and you have to do Bible study. You have to be strong. You can’t just be some sheltered little girl. And I believe that they’re sheltered kids. Even if we’re a big family, and some say that parang Keeping Up With The Kardashians kami. I mean, our values are still very much Pinoy and we’re very conservative. So before I let her be free and go out into the real world, she has to have those Filipino values intact.”
Putting The Gutz in Gutierrez
Attributing her admirable traits to the Gutierrez matriarch, Ruffa explains why her family is ever important—her reliable support system through life’s tough challenges. “My mom is a pretty strong force in my life because it was only me and her growing up. We were surrounded by boys—my dad and my five younger brothers. When I’m up. When I’m down. When I go through hardships, triumphs… They will always be there for me no matter what. So I consider us a tight-knit family. And now we share everything together. At this point, when there are lots of broken families and siblings that don’t get along. With us, if there’s a problem, no matter how big or minor it is, we solve them right away.”
Single-handedly raising and providing for two beautiful children, Ruffa is a striking example of the incredible modern mom—dedicated to the needs of her kids and unabashedly overcoming obstacles without the archetypal knight in shining armor. “Being a single mom is difficult,” she tells us, in the confident manner that has won her a crown decades ago. “We go through ups and downs. But at the end of the day, it’s also rewarding, because it really tests you as a woman. So if you succeed in that, knowing that your kids are going in a better place and you see that they’ll be successful one day, it’s rewarding.”
Do you like The Gutierrez Sisters? We like them too! Check out our other articles here:
What It Takes To Be A Gutierrez Mom
Slowing It Down With Sarah Lahbati
No Other Way But Together
Christmas Shopping Made Easy with Metrobank Credit Card’s PayNow Service
Photography by Miguel Abesamis
Art direction by Ferdi Salvador
Assisted by Patty Sacay
Words by Pipo Gonzales
Shoot coordination by Lianne Castro
Makeup by Mac Igarta
Hair by Archie Gilbero
Styling by Danae Dipon
Special thanks to:
Marriott Manila
Keli Devices
SuperSam.Ph
