Kids

Hobbies Our Daughters Shouldn’t Be Shamed For

by Kevyn Gohu
March 3, 2022

Our daughters should not be shamed for having these hobbies!

Hobbies, interests, and many activities only gained a gender over the course of time. Proven marketing strategies to particular audiences made people separate certain behaviors by gender. Dolls for girls, cars for boys — those changed over the years when we have men as amazing fashion designers and women as automobile champions. Despite the obvious, the shame persists and it starts at home. Our daughters, no matter what their hobby is (so long as it’s not self-destructive or destructive to others), need our support especially when it develops into their passion.

1. Playing video games

Even with Alodia Gosiengfiao as the poster girl of the girl gamer community, sexism still exists. Most gamer girls don’t get the same support as male gamers unless they dress in a particular way. It’s why some of our daughters would rather use gender-neutral in-game names. They avoid the shame from other gamers and are rated more objectively rather than their gender being the issue. While a balance of screen and off-screen time is a must, our daughters shouldn’t be shamed for playing video games as a hobby just because it’s marketed more to boys. Besides, studies have shown that our daughters can play just as well as sons and can learn game mechanics just as fast as them.

2. Loving all things pink

Ironically gendered to women, loving and collecting all things pink is a hobby that still gets our daughters scoffed and sneered at. The existing premise that “pink” is for girls works against them because many find pink to be “too girly”. Therefore, people attribute all of the negative things that involve girly. Electro Pink and Hot Pink may be harsh on the eyes for some but there are other classy and elegant shades of pink such as Dusty Rose, Flamingo, Rouge, Watermelon, and Coral. There are at least 129 shades of pink out there! One’s bound to tickle their fancy.

3. Collecting expensive jewelry

Collecting jewelry such as diamonds, emeralds, sapphires, rubies, on an 18k white gold/yellow gold setting often earns our daughters the stink eye from some because it makes them look “high-maintenance” and “snooty”. But it’s actually a pretty smart business investment. Especially if the jewelry has certification from a gemologist from the Gemological Institute of America (GIA), its price will never drop and they can pawn it or sell it to earn capital for their business. While there is a time and place for wearing that kind of jewelry, collecting expensive jewelry is a hobby our daughters shouldn’t be shamed for. Most especially, if they’re planning to get into the gem industry themselves and have a keen eye for carat, cut, clarity, and color.

4. Trying all sorts of drinks

There’s a fine line between alcoholism and just being a heavyweight in drinking. Some of our daughters are looked down on for having a higher alcohol tolerance. But it’s not their fault that their genetics made them more resilient against it. Asian bloodlines particularly are not made to tolerate alcohol. But those with European blood (i.e. Spanish blood) may have a higher chance because their livers can produce alcohol dehydrogenase (ADH) which breaks down alcohol faster. Or, they just have more antioxidants in their body which makes it easier for them to get rid of the alcohol.

5. Learning about their sexuality

Everyone has their sexual preferences. Our daughters probably have their sexual preferences, just that they don’t tell people. Humans are sexual beings and they will be curious about a lot of things. Sure it sounds too scandalous to be our daughters’ hobbies but it’s something that needs to be approached with an open mind and an academic attitude. It’s a natural thing to have sexual feelings. Acting upon it however is an entirely different matter especially when consent from the other party must be earned.

6. Having a “husband”

Collecting “husbands” or having a “husband” is when our daughters start fangirling a particular male character. Sometimes, they can be anime characters. Other times, it can be Witcher’s Geralt of Rivia played by Henry Cavill, or Captain America played by Chris Evans. Or even their BTS biases — our daughters look at these men as their ideal “male” or what they would like in a potential partner. The only time our daughters’ hobby in collecting or having a “husband” will get out of hand is they actively start stalking them. That might need a little sitting down.

7. Martial Arts or weapons collecting

Despite its practical use, some people still look down on girls that do martial arts. It may look good on screen but some people think it makes the girl too much of a “brute”. But what many don’t realize is that martial arts as a hobby also helps keep our daughters fit and graceful. There’s more to just knocking someone’s lights out and there’s also understanding the philosophy behind it.

8. Preferring more aggressive music

Our daughters may tell their friends they like Pop music or singers like Ariana Grande. But, sometimes — they use that as a cover for their other preferences especially if they’re metalheads. Metalheads are people who like Metallica, Judas Priest, The Priestess, DragonForce, Smashing Pumpkins, and other metal rock bands. But it’s their preference and if our daughters’ hobby is learning how to play like Slash from Guns ‘n’ Roses or Herman Li from DragonForce, that’s not something they should be shamed for. That kind of guitar playing takes a lot of calculations and stamina to get it perfect.

Our daughters’ hobbies should be treated like any other hobby: with respect!

Unless it’s something that will hurt people, our daughters’ hobbies shouldn’t be seen as a bad thing. Their hobbies reflect who they are and if they like Metal, that’s their preference. If they learning how to use a sniper rifle while in a pink dress then, that’s okay too. Hobbies are a core part of our daughter’s personalities and as long as they approach it responsibly and are aware of all the repercussions, it’s something that we should support them with.