How Gino Quillamor Is Embracing Changes After the Arrival of Baby Number 2
Boys Night Out host Gino Quillamor talks to Modern Parenting about embracing the changes of fatherhood.
Boys Night Out host Gino Quillamor became a father for the second time early this year when he and his wife Colleen welcomed their daughter Alana Cirilla. Allana joins the couple’s son Alec.
With being a father for the second time and returning to work in the radio station, how has Gino embraced fatherhood? Modern Parenting recently got to interview Gino on how things have changed.
Every Birth is Different
Gino shared that he has talked with friends and that being a father the first time is different the second time.
“A whole bunch of our friends and family always said that every child and pregnancy is different. They were absolutely right,” he starts. “Sleep patterns are different, behavior is also
super different. But I guess now that we’re on our second baby we’re a little more at ease with
carrying her and stuff. I would say that it’s a wee bit easier now since we had our first child at the
height of the pandemic when pretty much everything outside was still a mess and everything
around us felt unstable. At least now we can take our kids to the park and all.”
When it comes to disciplining, Gino admits to being the unofficial bad cop so to speak. “I’m just a little less patient than my wife is and I like keeping things as orderly and as clean as possible at home. Plus I think I also had stricter parents—so it’s kind of hard to shake off years of programming.”
“Ask me again if it’s still the same when our kids are teenagers. I honestly think I’ll be a bit more forgiving of going out, lending the car, dating, and all of that.”
Embracing the Changes
When asked how he has embraced being a father of two, he chuckled. “In a state of perpetual sleepiness? Tired overall? In dire need of caffeine at all times? In other words, pretty much like every parent of two out there?”
And while being a father of two kids can be overwhelming, Gino is grateful he has learned some things from his dad as he became a parent. “One of my key takeaways from my dad was to always do the decent thing. Not as easy as you might think it is. But I’m hoping that I’ll be able to teach my kids that,” he says. “Also—to be the hardest worker in the room even when you’re just dead tired. Hopefully, we’ll get our kids to be better versions of ourselves since that’s the main goal, right? The betterment of the generation that comes after us.”
The Value of Me Time
Although he’s balancing life as a dad, host, DJ, and husband, Gino does not forget to give some time for himself. “Even before becoming a father, I’ve always valued me-time. I’m a firm believer in having your
own time to do your own thing. Whether it’s for mental health or just growth as an individual. I
have a super simple analogy for it,” he shares. “When you’re traveling with your child on a plane and God forbid the oxygen gets cut out of the cabin, the airplane manual in front of you will always show that before you put the oxygen mask on your baby, you have to put it on yourself first. Simple logic behind it is—you have to help yourself first before you can help out others.”
“So yeah, I definitely value me-time. Though to be honest, I think my wife could use it more than I could since I really feel she does most of the heavy lifting in parenting.”
Parenting and Equality
When it comes to raising kids and sharing duties, Gino welcomes the equal load even if society still frowns on the concept of dads staying at home.
“I think we still have a long way to go in terms of being totally equal in parenting,” he said. “Society still kind of judges a man if he stays at home and takes care of the kids instead of his wife. But we’re
definitely heading towards that direction.”
“We’re seeing more and more families who have both parents holding day jobs. So the responsibilities of parenting really should be equal in that sense. If you’re asking me if I think I’m doing more in the house than the previous generation? Yes. If you’re asking me if the responsibilities have finally equalized? No. As much as I’d like to breastfeed our kids, I don’t think I can,” he jokes.
When asked how parenting has changed him, Gino says, “Where do I even begin? It’s not just a surface change. I think being a parent changes you to the very core. Before my wife and I had kids, we’d probably be drinking on an almost weekly basis. Every time we wanted to travel, the biggest hurdle was filing for a leave (of course the budget, too). And staying up late at night had zero to little immediate consequence.”
“Nowadays, even at a time when my wife could technically consume alcohol already, she can’t. Because we both know that if we got hammered tonight, we’d pay for it the next day when our kid would wake us up at 6 in the morning. And we wouldn’t want to be hungover while taking care of a toddler. We’re also way more cautious than we would’ve been if we didn’t have kids yet during the pandemic.”
Gino adds, “Oh, and planning a trip? It’s an entire production. We could’ve stayed for a week on a beach living off of the contents of one backpack before parenthood. Now, a single overnight trip with the kids results in the entire trunk of our car being packed with stuff. From a stroller to a kettle to specific pillows and comforters, and whatever random toys we feel like our kids will need.”
“It definitely needs a bit of getting used to. But we wouldn’t have it any other way,” he finishes.
Check out more stories about fatherhood on Modern Parenting:
Slick Rick on Being a Father: Like an Added Super Power
