You Are Not Alone: The Heartfelt Message Dear Evan Hansen Offers Families

The musical tackles issues families are facing today — suicide, anxiety, and social media

How do parents and teens talk when they’re struggling?

That’s the unspoken question behind Dear Evan Hansen, a musical that doesn’t shy away from heavy topics like suicide, anxiety, and the isolating effects of social media. Once whispered behind closed doors, these conversations are now front and center — not just on stage, but in families around the world.

With the show running at the Theatre at Solaire until October 5, Modern Parenting spoke to cast members Ellis Kirk and Sonny Monaghan (who play Evan), Rebecca McKinnis (Evan’s mom, Heidi), and Helen Anker and Hal Fowler (Connor’s parents, Cynthia and Larry Murphy) about how Dear Evan Hansen has opened up space for healing, honesty, and hope.

Photo by Zeus Martinez Photography for GMG Productions

Mental Health and Suicide: Conversations Families Need to Have

The topic of suicide is deeply sensitive, and in Dear Evan Hansen, it’s a central subject the Murphy family faces after losing their son, Connor.

For Helen Anker, Hal Fowler, and Rebecca McKinnis — who portray the parents of Evan and Connor — the show doesn’t shy away from difficult emotions. Coincidentally, the Manila production opened during Suicide Prevention Month, making its message even more timely.

“No matter whether you’re a parent or a child coming to see it, when you see your story on stage represented, it kind of gives you a platform to speak your truth,” says Rebecca. “I believe that coming to see this show can open up conversations between parents and kids about mental health — and perhaps give kids the bravery to talk to their parents about how they’re feeling.”

Hal adds, “The show doesn’t shy away from hard conversations. During Suicide Prevention Month, it’s a reminder that theatre can reach people in ways that statistics or lectures can’t.”

“If someone in the audience leaves feeling a little less alone, or willing to reach out for help, then I think we’ve done something worthwhile.”

Helen shares that since performing in the show, many people — from parents to young adults have approached her and her castmates to share their own experiences with anxiety, depression, and grief.

“It’s been so helpful to adults, parents, and children — whether they’re suffering from anxiety or not. The show gives people a way to feel seen.”

Photo by Zeus Martinez Photography for GMG Productions

Social Media: The Double-Edged Sword

In the musical, social media amplifies the illusion of connection while deepening Evan’s isolation and lies. In real life, it plays a similar role.

Rebecca recalled that during her earlier performances in the show, she struggled with the impact of social media — both as a parent and as a performer.

“When I first did this show, my daughter was nine or ten, so I didn’t fully relate. But now that she’s the age of the kids in the show, I’m very aware of the influence social media has on young people.”

As a mother, Rebecca admits she feels anxious about how dependent kids have become on their devices. She hopes the show encourages teens to take breaks from their screens and focus on real connections.

Hal echoes her concerns: “As a parent, I’m aware of how different the world is today from when I was a teenager. Social media can amplify connection, but it can also magnify anxiety and isolation.”

“The show puts that reality center stage — the pressure to belong, the comparisons, the longing. It reminds us not to dismiss those struggles, but to try to understand them.”

From the Teens Themselves

While Rebecca and Hal offer a parental perspective, Sonny Monaghan and Ellis Kirk — who alternate in the role of Evan — share what it’s like to grow up in today’s digital world.

“When I got into the show, it spoke to me so much,” says Sonny.

“It really shows the inside of a teenager’s head, especially in a world shaped by social media and the internet.”

Ellis adds, “Every character in the show feels alone at some point. It does a really good job of showing that everyone’s going through their own problems.”

“Social media often creates the illusion that everyone else is doing fine. That’s where the isolation sets in — even with all that supposed connection.”

The cast of Dear Evan Hansen answers questions during the media call on September 5. Photo by Zeus Martinez Photography for GMG Productions

Advice Is Never One-Size-Fits-All

For Helen, finding the right words — especially for people close to you — can be incredibly difficult, as shown in Evan and Connor’s experiences in the show.

​​”It’s so hard to know what to say, it is impossible to know what to say, because you have moments when whatever you say is going to be the wrong thing for them. And it doesn’t help,” Helen said.

One lesson she’s learned from experience is the importance of stepping back.

“Take a step back and let them work it out. I think a lot of the time we’re trying so hard, or parents try so hard, because it’s so important. Sometimes, taking that step back [helps] and for them to work out their problems on their own has worked.”

Hal reminds us that no family is perfect — but presence, even imperfect presence, can be life-saving.

“Sometimes it’s just about creating a space where a child feels safe to speak, or just showing up consistently, so they feel that they matter,” he says.

“In my role as Larry, I’m reminded of the damage that silence can do — and the healing that can come from trying, however imperfectly, to connect.”

Rebecca agrees: “What helps is allowing space — time and emotional room — so they can come to you if something’s wrong.”

Her advice to Heidi (Evan’s mother) reflects that same parenting wisdom: “Just give him some time. Life is busy, but that moment you give could mean everything.”

Photo by Zeus Martinez Photography for GMG Productions

To the Kids: You Are Not Alone

Among all the show’s messages, one stands out clearly: you are not alone.

“It gets said a lot, but it’s true,” Ellis says. “No one’s life is perfect. Everyone is going through something, and there is always someone — a friend, a parent, a loved one — who can listen.”

Sonny hopes the audience leaves the theatre with that message, too.

“We all feel lost sometimes. I hope they come out of the show feeling understood and hopeful that things will get better.”

Parents, Listen to Your Kids Too

Rebecca has one more message for parents: “Give yourself a break. No one’s perfect. Just do your best — show up, and create space for your kids to open up.”

Hal, for his part, adds:  “Parents talk a lot — do this, do that… But maybe it’s good for parents to try some listening instead. Create that space. Don’t always feel like you need to react — just listen.”

And most importantly for Hal? “What matters most is helping your child feel that they have a place — a meaningful, worthwhile place — on this fantastic planet.”

The cast of Dear Evan Hansen poses for photos during the media conference. Photo by Zeus Martinez Photography for GMG Productions

Dear Evan Hansen: A Message of Hope

At its core, Dear Evan Hansen reminds parents that presence matters, even when it’s imperfect. Amidst the daily grind, taking even just an hour to check in — to ask how your child is doing, to sit and truly listen — can mean the world.

Because in the end, it tells them what they most need to hear: You are loved. You are not alone.

Dear Evan Hansen runs until October 5 at the Theatre at Solaire.

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