Real Talk

When Women Are In Pain, Please Take It Seriously

by Kevyn Gohu
May 23, 2025

Sure, women will rant about their pain, but that doesn’t mean it’s something to ignore

Women go through a lot of pain in their lives. So much so that some dismiss it as just ordinary happenings like period cramps or the like. However, many often forget that women rarely complain about period cramps. They usually power through it with whatever remedies they’ve learned from their moms and lolas. So if a woman complains, it means there could be something lying underneath. Such was the case of the late young British boxer Georgia O’Connor, who passed away due to cancer.

She was 25.

Sure, women will rant about their pain, but that doesn't mean it's something to ignore — Photo from georgiaoconnor_1

It’s Not An Uncommon Occurrence

What happened to Georgia is not an uncommon story. Many women, both moms and daughters alike, are often misdiagnosed, especially when it comes to pain. Sometimes, it takes either a determined and highly experienced nurse, a very empathetic healthcare practitioner, or a very furious mama to force the hands of others to get women the diagnosis they need. Georgia, in an Instagram post in January, pens her frustration on how she was dismissed and how not one doctor “f**cking listened.”

“I said from the start I felt it was cancer. I KNEW the risks. I have colitis and Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis (PSC), two diseases that dramatically increase the chances of getting it. I KNOW how high my risk is, and they do too. They always did.”

She further adds, “Not one doctor took me seriously. Not one doctor did the scans or blood tests I begged for whilst crying on the floor in agony. Instead, they dismissed me. They gaslit me, told me it was nothing, made me feel like I was overreacting. They refused to scan me. They refused to investigate. They REFUSED to listen. One even told me that it’s “all in my head.”

For 17 weeks, she had been trying to find a diagnosis since the start of October. And her story does have a basis, too! Some studies revealed that there are gendered biases in the healthcare industry when it comes to pain. Some still believe that women tend to exaggerate their pain while men tend to downplay theirs (Hintz, 2023; Paganini, Summers, Ten Brinke, and Lloyd, 2023).

Never dismiss a woman’s pain

Every woman’s pain tolerance may be subjective, but that doesn’t mean it should be dismissed. Pain is the body’s way of saying, “Hey, something’s wrong! You need to get that checked!”

While there are physiological differences, that just means the pain can be in different places. Not in different degrees. Diseases don’t discriminate. They just present themselves differently, but with the same kind of pain and trouble. So, if our daughters or moms come up to us cranky and in pain, do take them seriously and advocate for them in the hospital. It isn’t easy to talk over the pain!

Georgia O’Connor also opened up last February about having a miscarriage. She was expecting a baby boy then.

References

Hintz, E. A. (2023). “It’s all in your head”: a meta-synthesis of qualitative research about disenfranchising talk experienced by female patients with chronic overlapping pain conditions. Health Communication, 38(11), 2501-2515.

Paganini, G. A., Summers, K. M., Ten Brinke, L., & Lloyd, E. P. (2023). Women exaggerate, men downplay: Gendered endorsement of emotional dramatization stereotypes contributes to gender bias in pain expectations. Journal of experimental social psychology, 109, 104520.

Stieger, A., Asadauskas, A., Luedi, M. M., & Andereggen, L. (2025). Women’s Pain Management Across the Lifespan—A Narrative Review of Hormonal, Physiological, and Psychosocial Perspectives. Journal of Clinical Medicine, 14(10), 3427.