Generation Gap: How To Negotiate With Our Kids

The biggest cause of conflicts at home is because of a generation gap between us and our kids. But here are some ways on how we can deal with it.

When we have conflicts at home with our kids, it’s usually because of a generation gap. The difference in time can cause our beliefs to change which results in a lot of heated arguments. We exchange harsh words, there are tears, and sometimes, it’s hard to keep up the gentle parenting when it’s a concept we don’t understand. So, we decided to come up with a guide on how we can negotiate with our kids especially due to generation gaps.

How do we negotiate when there’s a generation gap between us and our kids?

Generation Gap: The Usual Culprit for Arguments

generation gap

There’s usually no set time for how long it takes for it to qualify as a generation gap. But we often see this in our kids, especially in our teens and young adults when they don’t agree with what we say. They become more outspoken and tell us what they think about the old ways. Back in our day, we’re sure that our own parents would have been scandalized and we would have been whipped if we did what they did. But, we have to catch and ask ourselves: are we angry at the content or are we angry about how it was communicated to us?

Speaking Their Minds: Is It Rude for Kids to Do So?

generation gap

We, Filipinos, are not used to speaking our mind especially if it’s contrary to what the majority think. We believe in maintaining peace by just agreeing since it’s more for the greater good. But due to social media and the Internet, our kids have seen the pros and cons of thinking that way. While it’s good to keep the unity of the group, they’ll willingly stand up if the choice the group makes isn’t a good one.

“It’s Not About Disrespecting Us.”

We sometimes take offense when our kids speak against our thoughts. It sounds like an insult but before we cross that moat, we still have a chance to clarify what they meant. Keeping a positive and open communication line plays a big role in addressing the generation gap here especially when our kids are talking about topics that we don’t normally like talking about such as sex, drugs, porn, and other things.

Being More Conscious of Ourselves

While we have the responsibility to raise our kids, we also have to recognize that they are not an extension of us. They have their own thoughts and beliefs which they developed from meeting other people beyond us. The concepts may seem a little strange to us at first but we’ve always taught them how to keep an open mind. Just like our kids, we are also in a state of lifelong learning. All it takes is some child-like curiosity and a love for learning to keep those communication lines open.

Still having issues with the generation gap? Check out our other stories!

The Snowflake Generation: are parents raising kids who melt too easily?

Ruffa Gutierrez’s Motherly Love: Passing Womanly Strength and Courage to The Next Generation

The Generational Struggle Is Real: “When I was your age…”

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